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1. Relentless Peer Pressure
   In times past, kids were able to take a break from peer pressure. With social networking and texting capabilities, kids may feel pressured to be “on” 24/7 365 days a year.  The need to announce what you are doing, where you are going and who you are with may be stressful especially if the answers do not fit the mold of what is expected by the group.
   
   Action: If you haven’t already, consider time limits for internet and texting usage. Limits actually give kids a break from the peer pressure and an excuse (YOU!) for why they are being silent.
2. Opportunity for Reputation Damage
   The ability provided kids today to publish anything, anytime and anywhere is both a gift and a curse. In seconds kids can push information (pictures, videos, text conversations and more) to large numbers of people. This kind of power in the hands of young people with limited maturity (not a fault, just a fact) can be troublesome.

Action: To help kids protect their reputation, discuss the long term consequences of presenting oneself in ways that don’t reflect good character.

1. 3. Fake Profiles
   As a joke or as a way to “get back” at someone, kids may create a fake profile representing someone else.  This can lead to trouble with school officials or even police. Caution your kids about playing jokes or getting back in this manner.

2. 4. Cyber-bullying
   The National Crime Prevention Council’s definition of cyber-bullying is “when the Internet, cell phones or other devices are used to send or post text or images intended to hurt or embarrass another person.” Caution your children about cyberbullying. You don’t want them to be a victim or a perpetrator. (See Cyberbullying article in this booklet.)

3. 5. Desensitization to sexually charged images
   Myspace, more so than Facebook, exposes kids to sexually charged images and themes causing desensitization.

Getting a tattoo, whether it depicts the name of a current love or a symbol representing life values, is a big risk for anyone, but especially for young people.  Chances are the passion that motivates the decision to get the tattoo will change in days, months or years. What will remain is the tattoo.

Social networking profiles are like tattoos, say the creators of the Digital Tattoo Project at the University of British Columbia.  What you post today may be as difficult to get rid of tomorrow as a permanent tattoo.

So, what is your child posting on social networking sites? Kids are chatting, sending messages, posting pictures and uploading videos.  A recent national poll by Common Sense Media found that 28 percent of kids have shared personal information that they normally wouldn’t have shared in public and 39 percent have posted something they regretted.  Another website claims that 1 in 10 kids have posted a nude or semi-nude picture of themselves while a Cox Communications study reports 1 in 5 have engaged in sexting (sending a nude or semi-nude picture via mobile phone).  With these kinds of statistics there is reason to take action and talk to our kids about the importance of protecting their reputation online and off.

The best line of defense for your kids and their digital reputation is you.  Talking frequently with your kids about digital life, the risks involved and the importance of online reputation (their digital tattoo) can indeed make the difference when they are presented with an opportunity to post questionable content.

Action: Talk to your kids today about developing a positive digital tattoo.

Visit the Digital Tattoo Website, http://digitaltattoo.ubc.ca/, and explore the myriad of resources available to educate you on privacy, connection and learning.

As of June 2009, US teens still prefer MySpace according to a study done by Habbo, a youth-aimed virtual world. The study quizzed 112,000 teens ages 11-19 from more than 30 countries, including 4,500 teens in the U.S. Facebook came in third as the most popular Web site among U.S. teens, up from fifth last year. Globally, however, YouTube and Facebook rank , No. 1 and No. 2, respectively, with MySpace coming in at No. 4, the survey said.  So, what are some of the differences in the 2 social sites and why might kids like MySpace more than Facebook.

1-MySpace allows for complete profile customization so kids can express themselves creatively. They can design their profiles using HTML (Hypertext Markup Language) so that it represents their image or style in a very unique way. Facebook pages are all the same.

2-MySpace allows you to select a favorite song that plays on your profile. Facebook doesn’t. Music is so much a part of the teen experience that alone makes MySpace attractive.

3-Kids still rule on MySpace. Parents, while they may logon to MySpace to check on the kids, in most cases they aren’t there to socialize.  Facebook is a different story.  Parents and grandparents of teens are among the many new users establishing an active presence on facebook. Kids want the independence-the separate space- that MySpace still provides.

It is important to note that many kids maintain multiple profiles across multiple sites. Some profiles are more active than others. It is also common for kids to have profiles that are parent approved and others that are unknown to parents.

Action 1: Talk with your children about which sites they like best and why.  Remember that kids migrate from site to site and profile to profile. They will spend time where their friends are. New sites are added every day. The information you discover today may change next month.

Action 2: Add a reminder to your calendar talk with your children about this subject again in 3 months.

Mobile computing is here. Schools commonly distribute or require laptops as part of the curriculum and many teens carry Iphones or smart phones that possess all the capabilities of a laptop.  Centralized computing is not realistic.

So, what is parent to do to tame the technology monster in the home?

Action 1: Answer the question “What kind of supervision does my child need at this stage in life?”

The answer will depend on the age, maturity and circumstances of each individual child.

There many options available for managing technology in the home now.

• Internet providers like Cox Communications provide Parental Controls at the internet service level.
• Computer operating systems like Windows provides user level control (time limits) for internet safety.
• There are numerous software programs available for purchase that enable you to set boundaries on when and where your child can go on the internet. (Filters and Time Boundaries)
• There are software programs that allow you to virtually look over the shoulder of your child when they are on the computer in another room. (Monitoring in real time or Recording for later Review)
• And, last but not least, you can establish family guild that provide a system of protection for kids.  Rules should address time limits, respect of others, responsibility, privacy, and integrity.  See the Family Guidelines Tip for more info.

Action 2: Which options will you select to provide a safe mobile computing environment in your home?

Talk with your kids about these five safety tips.

1. Don’t text (or surf) and drive.
   According to SADD (Students Against Destructive Decisions) and Liberty Mutual Insurance Group, instant and text messaging while driving leads the list as the biggest distraction while driving.  When it comes to teen driving, put the danger of text-messaging while driving right up there with drunken driving as Public Enemies No. 1 and 1A on the nation’s roads.  Read more: http://tinyurl.com/nn5w26
2. Think before you upload photos or video from mobile phone to the Internet. Mobile phones allow instantaneous sharing of media between teens. Some of the most serious teen issues involving mobile phone use emerge from the ability to share photos and video.  Example: Child pornography is against the law.  Kids under 18 who share nude photos of themselves or others can be convicted of possession of and distribution of child pornography. Talk to your child about these serious issues.
3. Don’t store passwords to social sites on your phone.  If your phone is lost or stolen and your passwords are on the phone, your personal information will be available and your social sites will be vulnerable to take over by a stranger.
4. Social mapping – Announcing where you are may not be a good idea.  Smart phones are now capable of mapping where you are so others can find and meet up with you.   This information in the hands of a predator is extremely dangerous.
5. Texting/Facebooking strangers – Don’t share personal info or talk about sex with strangers. Don’t text someone you don’t know. Don’t answer or respond to messages that include sexual content.

Teach your kids to keep personal information private on Facebook and other social sites. Go through the Privacy Settings screens together so both of you understand the options and discuss the importance of keeping them secure. I suggest setting Basic Info on teen profiles to Friends Only so that non-friends are not allowed to browse your teens profile. In Contact Information area, teach your child not to publish contact info at all unless it is required as is the case for email address.  The email address visibility should be set to No One. To find the Privacy Settings screens:

• Login to Facebook
• Go to the Account Settings menu at the top right of screen
• Choose Privacy Settings from the drop down menu
• Choose Profile Settings on the page that loads
• Then, you will see the Basic and Contact Information screens shown here.

Figures 1 and 2 demonstrate the Basic settings configured to Friends Only and the Contact Info to No One.  Older teens may want or need to open up some of these settings, but starting a younger teen with these settings locked down is advisable.

Action: Logon to Facebook with your child and configure the settings appropriately.

Basic Privacy Settings on Facebook -Figure 1

Basic Privacy Settings on Facebook – Figure 2

Facebook Privacy Settings

Here are a few of the popular image sharing sites:

• Photobucket.com
• PictureTrail.com
• Picasa.Google.com
• Flickr.com
• YouTube.com

If your child maintains multiple profiles (for example, one on Facebook and one on MySpace), he/she may store pictures on a picture sharing site so that photos feed into the profiles automatically. Managing photos this way allows your child to upload photos/videos to one location and share them in multiple places very easily. While this is a smart management decision, it sometimes leaves even internet savvy kids vulnerable since they may overlook the fact that image-sharing sites need to be configured for privacy. Every site your child has an account on should be configured for privacy.

Action 1: Talk with your child about where they store the images and video files that they create.

Action 2: Check the privacy settings on the photo or video sharing sites that your child uses to make sure they are set to private not public.